MORE POLLUTERS' TRICKS AS PRACTICED IN ELMIRA, ONTARIO

 Rule #1:  You will never find that which you do not look for.

Rule #2:   If you stumble across a nasty surprise refill the hole and move elsewhere (quickly)

Rule #3:   If an informed source advises you where to sample either ignore, make excuses, or question                        their credibility.

Rule #4:  Refer to all high concentrations of contaminants as anomalies or possible lab errors. Then take                   at least another 25 samples in known cleaner areas to show that the high result was anomalous.

With the adroit use of hydrogeological principles try to ensure that your sample depths are the least likely to find high concentrations of contaminants. Where possible have backup groundwater monitoring wells that are screened in both a higher and lower aquifer (i.e. a nearby "window" in the aquitard) in order to have elevation readings that can be used to confuse groundwater flow directions. This is particularly helpful when "proving" hydraulic containment.

Be well politically connected in order to be able to separate the wheat from the chaff. Most of the above tricks will fool 90% of the local citizens but the remaining ones may need to be "removed" from public consultation committees arbitrarily by the local Council.